Sorry

I understand that there are some problems and I am not too blind to know all the pain you kept inside you even though you might not show. If I can apologize for being wrong then it’s just a shame on me I’ll be the reason for your pain and you can put the blame on me.

Into each life there comes a time when you must pay your lovers' dues. I know I was wrong for treating you the way I did but I have so much on my mind. I didn’t know where you fit in and I thought I already said that to you. If I could do it all over again, I’ll never let you get your ways, I'll never let you move into me.

I’m sorry that I ever did it to you, that I ever made you cry. 

Lastly, I'm sorry that I can't break down in tears.

Good vs Bad

What is good? What is bad?

Each individual believe in their own perspective. I have friends who smokes. Straight-A Student. In the Dean's list. I have friends who drinks like mad at the same time friends that never fails to be there for me when I'm in need of help. Some friends do drugs but willing to go thru trouble for me. Some of them do things that you could not even imagine.

Today, I followed some of my friends to smoke. I look at each of them. All of them with no doubt are nice people, down to earth that I always have respect for. But why some people judge smokers so terribly? Nampak orang smoke je, terus label budak jahat. Maybe MOST of smokers are bad but isn't what you're doing is generalize? Is it fair for you to think that way? Why people stereotype? It's the soceity isnt it? The society pictures a good man with a good features, fair, tall, nice, kind bla bla. So what about some people that does not have those? Bad people?

For me, the most important question is, Who are you to judge?

When someone says that I'm selfish, cheater, jerk. I'll get soooo badly hurt. Not because of them, not because of the words. But because of how untrue it is. People judge without knowing the truth. Without trying to understand. Without listening. I hate being judged for things thats not right.

Sometimes I feel tired of being me. I feel like lettting myself loose. I'm so sick of worrying what people might think of me. Like it or not, we're living in a cruel world. Call me cheater call me liar call me selfish call me a bitch call me watever you want after this cause I won't feel hurt hearing it since I'm being one.

Foolish

After feeling numb from reading FIN 202, I decided to stop for awhile. So I sit here, in front of my laptop at 1.12am in the morning feeling nothing.

Actually, I don't feel like updating my blog at all today thus I went on reading my previous posts that I wrote wayy long time ago. Some of them filled with happiness but MOST of them loaded with emo shit. hahahaha. But something caught my attention though. Particularly the part when I laughed while reading almost all of the previous posts.

I used to be so emotional and sensitive at any single shit that moves around me(still am? hahaha) I remember those moments of break ups, make ups, hook ups, brain breaking, nerve wrecking, heart aching jiffy. I remember how depressed I was during those times. At one point of time I thought that I wasn't strong enough to live through all of it. Sad case right? Gudness, i used to be such a sad child! hahaha

But hey, look at me now. You see, I always tell my friends and remind myself that what ever problems that you may have, just be strong and hold on for awhile cause when the clouds go away and thesun comes in, you'll be okay. By the time it's all over, you look back then you'll be laughing at yourself and would think how silly you can be. I'm proud to say that I've grown up. I'm over all this small petty shit. ...... so should you.

Communism

When they want C*** back home and why they support LTTE, they has been said to spark the fire. Is that true?

Most probably it is but the MALAY!!!! need to think, why they keep asking for this.

They want us to think a bit. Take a look at North Korea, even they are communist country but still they can build missile, China PR can be one of the powerful nation on earth and for LTTE, they still can build light war planes even they did not have resources.

Look ! We say they are the enemies but what they achieve compared to us? Think ? If we said democracy is the best for us but why we can't be like Singapore and why some does not want Islam to rule, look at Iran, they can build missiles too...!

DO NOT INTERPRATE LITERLARY